Proposal

We started dating January 24th and by Easter we had started talking about our future together. Yes, life had hit the fast-forward button and it has been wonderful. So yes, I knew a proposal was coming, but I didn't know when or how. We had shopped for rings a little bit so he had at least the knowledge of the size of diamond & ring that I was interested in. I really wanted it to be something he would buy me & not something that I had picked without his say. Many of you guessed we would get engaged on our six months and little did I know that he actually had the ring at that point. Then many of you guessed we would get engaged when we went camping on the North Shore. Knowing Zack though, I knew he would never do it when anybody expected and nobody would know except for him when or how it was going to happen.

The week leading up to the engagement I had received an e-mail coupon for a nice sushi restaurant. Being that I really enjoy sushi and we had not been on a date night recently I suggested buying the coupon & dressing up to go on a date night. Knowing that he wanted to propose that weekend he agreed. So we bought the coupon, got dressed up, me wearing my nice purple dress and he wearing his nice purple shirt (the boy knows I love the color purple) and off we went to dinner. It was not that cold out so I didn't take a coat, but he did & of course I had to give him a hard time about it. He's response was, "Well, you never know!" We enjoyed a nice meal of sushi & other Asian cuisine with the nice Asian techno background music. As we were walking back to the car it was a little bit chilly out, but Zack quickly put on his coat & didn't offer it to me. As we were driving home Zack asked if I would like to get a bottle of wine to cap off the night. This is a typical date night for us, dress up, have a nice dinner, & enjoy the time together with some wine. So we stopped at Trader Joe's and bought some wine & continued on our way home.

We had just pulled into the parking lot of the seminary apartments and parked the car & naturally I started to gather my things to get out, but he says, "I have a confession." I'm thinking, "ummm...ok?" and he confesses that he wanted to buy wine so that we could celebrate & that he brought his coat with him because he was hiding something from me. This is when I realized what was happening & was internally freaking out just a little bit. As he pulled out the ring he told me that I'm his best friend and that he loves me and then he asked me to be his wife. Believe it or not I was speechless so I kissed him before saying, "yes, of course I'll be your wife."

So yeah, we were in his car in the parking lot and it was perfectly sweet and simple.

I learned that he had thought about asking at the restaurant, but the music threw off the mood. Plus it was pretty crowded. I teased him that we can't ever get rid of his car & his response was "that's sad." It has already been a crazy week & a half of trying to tie down dates & locations. This is what we know: July 2nd, 2011 Luther Seminary. More details will come for sure. In the meantime here are some photos we took right after we got engaged.

ENGAGEMENT!

Yes it is true. Little did I know 8 months ago that I would fall totally in love with this man, but here I am now with a little bling bling on my left hand. I remember the night he first asked if he could kiss me & I knew I had to say yes or I'd regret it and I also remember thinking that was my last first kiss. Somehow I knew that he was who I was meant to spend my life with and it was terrifyingly fantastic.

We had spent the Fall semester getting to know one another and don't really remember any particular introduction, but many short memories of bumping into each other within the first month of school and occasionally being in the same group of friends hanging out. My first memory of him is probably as the cute guy that held the door for me and let me into the dormitory as he was leaving the building. He remembers me as the cute girl who always had a smile on her face. Then one evening our friend who was working security with him introduced us formally I believe. As I write this little memories come back to me.

It quickly became routine for us to visit either in the mornings when I was on campus early and he was done studying in the cafeteria or when I was working the info desk & he was on security duty. One time our friend that had formally introduced us gave us a hard time for talking and I played along with it saying that we were planning our future together and told him to but out. Our friendship escalated from there and by the end of the semester we had become good friends. We even had what we like to call our proto-date before Christmas break. We kept in touch over the holiday break and me being gone with J-term requirements and I wasn't back more than a day and he we were hanging out. I thought we were going to just go out with some friends, but he came in to watch a movie, a long movie, and then he stayed after that even. The sweetest part of that night is it took him probably a good 3 or more hours to hold my hand.

The next day we saw each other on campus for a community breakfast with some friends. I had no groceries yet and knew it was the only way I was getting breakfast that morning. As I was going to leave he asked me if I wanted to hang out and I told him to just give me a call in a little while not remembering that I had to pick up a friend from the airport. I wasn't gone for 15 minutes and he called telling me to call him when I was done grocery shopping. Well thankfully I had remembered that I had to pick up our friend so I told him I would just stop by after I was done helping her move back in & that we were all hanging out on campus that night. It was a fun night with cheap pizza, friends, and a movie started at 11:45pm. It was around 1am when I got a phone call from him. The ring of my phone woke me up (I fell asleep within the first 20min of the movie & he had been there when I fell asleep so I was very confused). He told me he had a question for me & so I went to his room half asleep where he asked me if he could kiss me. I remember walking back downstairs with my girlfriends that night & when I knew we were out of earshot of the guys floor I said, "Uh, I think I'm dating Zack."

Our first official date was the very next day to Old Chicago where I had some guy get excited about my Harry's Chocolate Shop hoodie. Classy, I know! We've spent nearly every day together since, well minus the summer since he lived 5 hours away. God has truly blessed us with one another and I can't wait to put all the fun details of a wedding together and start my life as his wife.


Next blog will be the story of the engagement & hopefully some photos if my computer behaves. For now I must go sleep!

Year 18

So the first week of the start of my 18th year of school is well underway. It's prolly more like the 21st or something if you count pre-school too. Actually the week is technically over. The reading lists are well over 1,000 pages between all of my classes, for the semester. It's an interesting place to be. I'm not totally new, yet I've still got a few years ahead of me with plenty of transitions to come. The semester is going to be plenty busy, but thankfully it looks like it should end on a smooth note. That is as long as I stay on top of everything throughout the semester. I'm taking fun classes like Hebrew, Preaching, the Gospel of Mark, Mission 1, & Church Music. Not only is that all fun, but I get to use the awesome skills that summer Greek taught me in my Mark class. It'll be interesting using Greek while learning Hebrew. One thing that I continue to learn in seminary is how to put my thoughts about the church & mission & my life into words for people to understand. I know this might seem like a "duh" thing, but you don't always realize how much we can't explain why we believe certain things or act a certain way until we're made to. It's been a productive evening of laundry, cleaning the house, updating my calendar & getting a feel for the semester load. Now time for bed :-)

Grad School Ladies

Summer Photo Favorites

New Dawn 08-09 reunited at the Wait wedding



Grand Forks dates



4th of July!



sillyness



Cap reunion at a CAP/YE wedding



camping on the North Shore

and thus summer comes to an end with the funness of endorsement essays, CPE interviews (for next Spring), the knowledge of passing summer Greek, and a pretty long "to do" list that needs completed before classes start in a little over a week.

summa summa summa time

So as you can see my blog has been changed yet again. I'm not really sure what happened to my old background that took me quite a bit of time to do, but it wasn't there anymore & blogger/google reformatted a lot of their things so I just chose one of their new designs.

Some highlights from Summer:
*Finishing the semester 2 days earlier than expected
*Celebrating summer birthdays
*My first trip to Alabama (visiting Zack's brother & sister-in-law)
*Learning how to make sushi
*living right next to campus
*4th of July weekend
*6 great months celebrated
*Greek
*August

yep, life is crazy & great as usual so there's my high lights. Stay classy till next time!

rice

Right now I'm making a fresh batch of rice in my cooker. I've always liked rice. I always wanted rice as a side option when I was growing up and my brother never wanted rice as an option. The steamed smell reminds me of my time over seas last year (in SE Asia). It's hard to believe that I returned a year ago this coming week. I was ready to be home and see friends & family. Now I live 10 hours by car from my family & am lucky to see them more than just the major holidays. I'm lucky if I even am able to make it home for the major holidays actually. It's funny to think how such a simple thing like cooking rice can bring so many memories.

As a kid I was incredibly picky & also on chemo so I had cravings for a lot of mashed potatoes and plain cheese nachos or cheesy broccoli rice. I still really enjoy good mashed potatoes (really what makes them bad?) and plain cheese nachos are a guilty snack on a rare occasion. However, I'm not sure the last time I had cheesy broccoli rice. I have grown to really enjoy plain steamed rice. I don't think this says anything about my personality since I've recently learned that one's personality doesn't change as we grow, but our character can. I think this is an example of my ever changing pallet.

There are 3 weeks left in the semester and I should be reading till my eyes bleed right now, but here I am talking to you about my love for rice. Recently I took part in the Strength Finders 2.0 workshop for one of my classes. I learned that my top 5 strengths are woo, communication, positivity, arranger, and developer. I like to win people over & make connections every where I go. I like to tell stories to relate to people. I tend to always see the glass half full, am organized & flexible, and do what I can to lift others up. It is interesting working with these & the truth that they hold. Just because I know & was not super surprised with the answers (many people aren't) doesn't mean there isn't room to work on my strengths. This study was started because so often in our world we make each other work on the things we aren't good at. Not that it's bad to improve on things, but we'd all be a bit happier if we helped each other work on what we're good at, what makes us thrive inside.

What is it that makes you thrive? What is it that makes you so happy that you know the presence of the Holy Spirit is with you? Rice makes me happy, amidst many other things. Today I was overwhelmed in worship by the presence of the love from the community in that church body as well as where they're taking it. I was overwhelmed by the outpouring of love that my boyfriend constantly gives me; the outpouring of love that I've always received from my family & friends. Like I said, it's the end of the semester & I'm stressed. I should be a lot more stressed. However, when I focus on knowing that I've gotten to where I am I know that I will continue to go further. The biggest catch is letting God lead the way ALL the time. As I learn how to better do this I'll keep making my rice & working on the things that make me thrive (relationships, travel, international ministry, health). Despite if we are feeling our strengths or not we will never be given anything that we cannot figure out because "[We] can do anything through Christ who strengthens us." (Phil 4:13) Yes, we need Christ, the risen Lord, we need to acknowledge the Spirit who is with us daily leading & surrounding us & the God who created us & continues to love us despite our short comings. We cannot find the joy in things like fixing rice on our own. This may seem silly, but the rice came from farmers (fellow brothers & sisters) who Jesus loves, who God loves, just as much as anyone else, We are called to do as Jesus has done & love all things because they have been given to us by God the Father.

food for thought.

Fuzz

I'm not talking about the police or a bear, but the continuing season of Lent. Clever, I know!

It's late, but I haven't blogged in a long while and it seems time. I have come to write something a few times since the last post, but really wasn't sure what to write since it didn't seem much had changed. Life is still pretty much a tornado with constant goings on. My Greatest Great Uncle D would've loved to hear all the silly crazy fast paced things I've been reading and writing about these days. He and I used to always write to each other, me about my crazy fast paced adventures and him about the times he'd been to where I was or jokes he heard about the places. I digress.

This Lent I challenged Zack to give up sweets with me. Now sweets ended up being more defined by desserts. With him having a meal plan though and constant desserts being served in the cafeteria, plus he's got a giant cavern of a sweet tooth or three, this was a big challenge. I personally don't like chocolate all that much and am more of a fruit person so I didn't think it would be too hard. However, as the weeks have passed on and Girl Scout cookies have been bought, chocolate easter eggs have been gifted, I feel as if I have a heaping pile of goodies waiting for us on Sunday. This is exciting, but at the same time it's been a really good challenge. Being Lutherans we don't always give something up for Lent and in recent years it has been a trend within many of my circles of friends to take something on. I've been thinking more lately about where God wants me to be used and where I'd be happy as far as careers go. I have had several interviews and nothing has come of them. However, for the most part, I know that it's been right for nothing to come of them. The challenge I've focused on during Lent has been more on how to slow down a bit and focus on the face of Jesus in my everyday life so that I can learn to be more like Jesus in my everyday walk. Don't get me wrong, I'm really lookin' forward to the Somoa cookies and the freedom of eating whatever I want (within reason of course), but I hope to continue reflecting on the face of Jesus and his ways of teaching me to be in the moment.

The Holy Spirit is here, there, and everywhere with us, but Jesus meets us in the moment.

You got some lent on you there

Joy sun! Good morning! Boker Tov!

I cannot tell you the last time I was up this early on a Saturday morning. I know you're thinking "poor you." As much as I'm not always a morning person I really enjoy mornings. I enjoy the freshness of the day with the sun rising & slowly heating up the air. Each day I try & start my day, usually before I even get out of bed with telling God g'morning. This may seem silly to some, but even though I like things about the morning I usually am a little grumpy when I first wake up. My family would say I'm a lot grumpy when I first wake up. By greeting & acknowledging God it helps me to attempt to start focusing my day around the works of the Trinity in my life.

Recently life has just been a whirlwind of fun school projects, meeting up with friends from outside of seminary, & making time to hang out with friends from seminary. I've been getting involved with an emergent church called Jacob's Well and feel called & pushed by the Spirit to be involved there. Most of my time is spent with seminary somethings as there is always pages of reading to be done so that words can be written & papers turned in. Most days I feel like I am not taking enough time to focus on the Trinity even though I start my days with an attempt to center around the Trinity. However, the Spirit, specifically this past week has been so present that it gave me the jitters. I told one friend, when relaying a story about Zack & I, that this year the Spirit has completely knocked me off my feet while Zack swept me off my feet.

Since the beginning of 2010 I have known of 5 deaths, 6 births, and this next Saturday will be attending my first of nearly 12 weddings for the year. I don't even know how to move past that reality of the sadness & rejoicing & all the other mixed emotions that come with these life happenings. Maybe that's the Spirit's point, maybe that's Jesus' point, to keep focusing on the incredible fact of the empty cross. Thus be my Lenten journey, it just started a little earlier than Ash Wednesday.

lovers weekend

Happy Valentine's Day, Singles Awareness Day, Lovers Day (that's what I like to call it), or whatever else you call it.

Classes started back up last week & as I had predicted I would be in way over my head before it even began. I really shouldn't be blogging right now, I should be reading, but writing/typing things down is good for the soul. I started journaling when I was in elementary school, but didn't really become a regular journal writer of any sort till middle school. It's fun to be able to share my life with all yall, as well as have it on record for me to look back at.

This past weekend was wonderfully fun. God continues to amaze me with all the blessings that have been part of my life, people and experiences. A year ago my New Dawn team was at the Bethany Home in the Northwest part of Malaysia. We were filled with the joy of our friends there, especially the faith of Jayasingh. I learned from him to not let my worries get the best of me because Jesus has already taken care of it. "Don't worry, it's already done!" he would say to my team. Yet of course I still worry about life and friends & future endeavors, things I don't always have control over. I am reassured through the many blessings & ways I see the Holy Spirit working day & night that my life is in God's hands.

This past weekend I watched the opening ceremony of the winter Olympics with some friends on Friday and Saturday had a lazy day till the evening. Saturday evening was the Love Me Tender Valentine's dinner & dance. So my friends & I got all gussied up & enjoyed food & fellowship & some AWESOME dance moves. I got to wear a dress I bought for senior year homecoming at Capital. This was nice because I think I had only worn it one other time & because people thought it had maybe been a bridesmaid dress. It's always nice to be complimented & everybody looked great. After the fun there a bunch of us went to celebrate a friend's birthday. Sunday morning was church at Jacob's Well. I've started attending there & really enjoy the worship & community. Then Zack and & I went to a very nice dinner to finish out the weekend. Now it's back to the grind. Enough blogging for now. Happy Day!

photos of the boy & I

it's not the best quality, but here we are, sir Zachary & I. We had a little fun on photobooth :-)

make over

I thought I'd give this loverly blog a make over today while I was at work. It took forever which has convinced me to not change it again for a very long time, if ever. I'm back in MN now & yes it's uber cold. When questioning why I moved to such a cold state a friend said that the cold will only make me stronger, which then I asked if that means that I'll have huge muscles by the end of my seminary career :-)

Trying to get back in the flow of being here again. It's good to be back, but I am not motivated to get much done. I also don't have a ton to get done right now so the things that I need to be working on are getting pushed to the back burner. I have been able to be reacquainted with seminary friends and see a few others. I got to have lunch with my friend Emily who works for YE, so I also got to see other office folk that are great. Then I got to have Caribou with my former teammate from New Dawn, Kristine. We hadn't seen each other in several months so that was really nice.

One big recent change is I'm in the dating scene again. I wouldn't advertise it except for the fact that we put it on facebook and people have questioned if it's real or not. I just learned this evening that my own family was calling each other to tell one another to look at my facebook page. I'm glad all yall are excited, but it kinda seems as if yall never thought I'd date anybody again. Other people's reactions are just funny, which is good. We're happy to be together & it's a boost that others are happy for us.

I will have a picture or two soon, promise!

sunny filo!

One of the few terms I learned last year while overseas is "sunny filo," which means "happy new year."

It's already toward the end of the first month and I'm at the end of my travels. So far 2010 has proved to be a doozie. The past few Januarys have been rough for one reason or another, but this has proved to be the hardest. The affects of the earthquake in Haiti have hung heavy on my heart for various reasons. Before I go into that I will mention that my first J-term (January term) was a success. It wasn't the most formational part of my call in Diaconal Ministry, but it was reassuring that I am where I need to be and the bonus is I made several new friends. Plus I got to see some of the historical sites of Gettysburg, D.C., AND stay in a former Civil War Orphanage for two weeks.

The news of Haiti first came to me via a facebook status which lead me to know that there had been some sort of natural disaster. One thing led to another and the continuation of devastating news came in. I was blessed to meet the Wartburg seminary student, Ben Larson, that died in Haiti nearly 2 years ago when I was visiting the seminary. His wife and I have the great connection of being best friends with the Oleson sisters. The news was saddening in general and moreso to be with close friends and fellow Wartburg students, to the Larson family and experience their grief made it real. I knew a handful of other people in Haiti, or near, at the time and thankfully they are all safe. Another fact that makes this hard to accept is knowing how called myself, and many I am friends with, are to do missions work around the world. No matter where we are, we often just pick up our stuff and go as we feel God is calling us, and we never know exactly what we're getting ourselves into.

After the Diaconal event in Gettysburg I was blessed to be able to visit some Spoke Folk friends in Baltimore for the weekend. While there I learned that a friend of mine who is a former Youth Encounter teamer, Mikey, has recently been diagnosed with terminal cancer. He has chosen to receive treatment and fight the disease as it is not like him to just sit back and let it consume him. Mikey is a great guy with a beautiful family, wife & little boy as well as sister & mother. I pray for comfort & the continuation of hope & strength to always have a smile and a good laugh about the little things.

The strength I find in all of this is through Jesus. Not just that Jesus is great and all, but the actions that are so elementary in many of our faiths. It is not just the cross that gives us hope for a better future, but the reality of Jesus' resurrection and the continuing work of the Holy Spirit that we can see or feel every day.

2010 hasn't had the best take off. I'm in good ol' N. Manchester today & headin' back on the road tomorrow. I look forward to being back in MN even though it's at least 10 degrees colder than here and more like 15 or more degrees colder than the weather I left in MD. It's crazy to think a year ago I was in China. As my "husband" would say, "life is weird!"

Yuletide Blessings

"Butter my butt & call me a biscuit!"

Last Friday, while hanging with a friend, we found this calendar that had funny "country" sayings on them. This made us laugh as neither of us are from the country. Although I'm a bit more of a country bumpkin than he is I think.

The semester went by fast, not much of a surprise really. It was a great adventure with the constant twists & turns of life. It'll be good to know that I passed everything in a few weeks when the papers are graded. I'm looking forward to the bit of traveling I'm able to do now that break has started and clear through the end of January. It is such a blessing to have all of my things in one place with the few select things that are still stored at my parents' home. My highs for the semester are making new friends and getting to know them. As well as feeling the passion of the Spirit within my life and knowing that I'm in the right place. My lows would be the constant transitioning that is life & how tiring that is. I've seen the Spirit working through my friends and professors and have a better means of verbalizing my theological thoughts because of seminary life. I do miss being able to be relational as much with friends and strangers and not feel like I should be doing something else. I also miss traveling a little bit, but at the same time I don't miss all the driving (it was nice to not be a driver last year). I'm sure I've changed in a few other ways, but one way I've changed since the end of YE life and the moving so far from home is I've become domestic. Whoda thunk the day would ever come? I suppose being hospitable comes only natural as it is a gift of my mother's and was for sure a gift of my mammaw's. The lesson I learned, I need to learn how to say "no." That silly word that most 2 year olds love, I need to remember & not get in over my head.

Yesterday I traveled with two friends back to IN for the holiday. Once we hit the Chicago area it was like being back in the home area. The hills of WI are beautiful to drive through, but the slight rolling hills of much of northern IL and northern IN are home. It's not flat, although some friends would disagree, but states such as KS are flat. The crazy thing is we even saw some farmers still harvesting their corn despite the fact that it's the middle of December and there's snow on the ground. The cold in MN is so dry, but the cold here is damp & chills you down to the bone. Today was baking day & fun, but tiring after at least 5 different Christmas treats. Once again, that domestic side of me taking toll!

I get to travel to C-bus for New Years! I haven't been there in going on 2 years, it'll be great to go back & see friends & meet one's little boy. Then I'm off to the east coast for the first time since early August of 2007. It'll be great to be back out that way & see friends there while doing a bit more discernment about the diaconal program. Apparently nobody @ home really understands what my program is at the seminary, ha! For a little clarification I am a Master of Divinity non-ordination student, a candidate for the ELCA's diaconal program, with an emphasis in the Children, Youth, & Family program at Luther Seminary. What this all means is I will be doing the program to be a pastor, but do not feel called to parish ministry so I am not currently planning on getting ordained. Through the diaconal program, which is focused in word & service, I will be consecrated and rostered through the ELCA. My emphasis is because I feel called to work within children's hospital chaplaincy, but also am passionate about service work and non-profit missions. God only knows where I'll actually end up!

That's my hit the ground running sorta life that God's got me livin' right now. 2010 is nearing & who knows exactly what's around the bend other than J-term & another exciting semester of seminary. Despite the car troubles I've had since moving to MN, and they've been significant, I look forward to experiencing all 4 seasons in MN. I think the catch is to go someplace different for J-term each year & at least miss that one cold month :-)

Laundry Day

One more day of classes till a week off, 2 days for some. Then a few days with people around till everybody heads home or somewhere to meet with family for Thanksgiving.

Last week I celebrated 18 years since I was diagnosed with cancer. It was a lovely day of working the info desk. and then meeting up with friends to go for ice cream (which I do every year) and after that Chinese food and a showing of Princess Bride in the apartment. It's always a bit of a weird time of reflection for me, but knowing that I'm still kicking & breathing and through the grace of God I'm forgiven of all my daily inequities that I must keep going forward as best as I know how. It's also a blessing that I always have friends, new and old, that celebrate with me.

Some days it doesn't seem like I know how to keep kicking and breathing, but let's admit it, I'm a feisty person who even when I'm in a super funk or feelin' low I find something to laugh about or be cheerful about. A lot of the time it's at myself for being ridiculous, for not treating every day like it's a new start. Moving the furthest away from home has proved to be a great challenge as I can't just go home on a weekend. I could clearly get in my car, drive 9-10 hours on a Friday, spend Saturday in IN and drive back on Sunday, but that would not be relaxing in any way. I miss my Bert and Alissa and my cousins and a lot of other people too & the cornfields. I miss the adventure that my life held a year ago, I miss the people I've lived with in the last couple of years. Here I go focusing on all the things that I can't change, except for they are the things and the people that have changed me.

Recently I've been asked to tell my call story a few times or with my anniversary last week, to share a part of my past that has helped shape who I am in a great way. When I tell about how I got to where I am today I know that I'm where God wants me and all I can remember is the peace that I felt when I made the decision to be here a year and a half ago. It's not just that I felt that peace when I decided to go on New Dawn last year, but my teammates did as well when they made their decision. When you're living in intentional community you think you're crazy and you long to have your own agenda. Now that I'm not living in intentional community I miss the things that drove my teammates and I crazy, like check-ins and the atmosphere where you had to know how people were doing beyond saying "I'm fine or good or great" and knowing why. Don't get me wrong, I have friends to check in with both here and those friends that I had to do that with for a year.

The other day in chapel we sang "Seek Ye First." Simple words, with not always a simple action, but something that I strive for everyday and hope to exemplify in my actions and words. Remembering that peace is a safe place. So when I don't feel like I can keep kicking I remember God's peace and the push of the Holy Spirit and know that I have to keep going to serve Jesus as he served us.

Laundry's done

Happy Thursday

Today, although dreary & rainy, has been a GREAT day.

I was able to talk with a friend in Hong Kong this morning for the first time in at least two months. May I just say that SKYPE is an incredible invention. Praise Jesus for the person(s) who conjured it up along with the the other things that make it all work. I went off to school, got some reading in, heard my favorite Psalm (43) be read in chapel, had good discussion in class, & then a good lunch with other diaconal candidates & ministers. I then went to meet with my financial coach & when I was on my way to go grocery shopping (I haven't been in at least 3 weeks) I got a phone call from some friends I hadn't seen in over a month saying they were coming into the city & wanted to meet up.

I am a person who loves to be around others and definitely feel fed when I have quality time with people. A day filled with good discussions, quiet purposeful God time, & surprises ranks high in my list of good times. I didn't get any grocery shopping done, but I came home & ate 4 potatoes :-D (they were really small).

I have been over the top busy with school work & life lately. I always have papers to be writing & of course reading to be done so that I can write the papers. In at least three of my classes one of the main focuses is noticing where God is and through that knowing who God is within the text & that then leads us to who humans are within the text & who God is calling us to be. I've recently read about a very commanding God, but God is so confident in His commands that humans follow what He says. Through human's fear God gets respect & obedience. Although, much like my own life, it seems that the humans do not always know why they're doing what they are. However, they continue on, with questions, but they continue on, just as I do with life. I'm sure I'm not alone in this especially after my conversations today.

Just some thoughts to ponder: Who is God in your life & who is God calling you to be?

Off to work on another paper! Praise Jesus for education :-)

Minnesota Chill

The warmth of September has gone & the cold has begun, but I know that it will get much colder within just a few weeks.

This is the start of week 5 of seminary. It's crazy how fast it all goes by when you're in classes & working & attempting to have a social life too.

I have made some great friends at the seminary and have been blessed to run into a few other friends that are in the cities. The first day of class was a little intimidating, overwhelming, & invigorating. Since then I have attempted to keep up with all the reading, but like all my peers have said, it's nearly impossible.

The first few weeks were filled with fun outtings to the como zoo & conservatory, had a campfire in the park, many dinners at my place with friends, & just this weekend was girls night. So I can't say that my social life has really been lacking as God has more than provided a wonderful network of friends that when we're not eating together or whatever else we're studying together. This next weekends outting is for sushi!

Some days I wonder what I'm doing back in school, but I know that I am here for God. God called me here & I am learning so much that will help me in whatever future ministry I am called to.

5 AM theives, towels, & a u-haul

A week ago I was all packed up in the house ready to pack the u-haul in the morning. Our good friends came & helped us pack everything up & then we had the day to do last minute errands & go to a wedding of a life long friend.

4:30 Sunday morning came around after a few hours asleep & I got up. As I'm taking my last few belongings out to the car I hear that the newspaper person (not sure if it's a man or woman) caught some guys trying to break into the neighbor's house. Thus while all my possessions were sitting in the drive way (or car park, whichever you choose) & thankfully nothing was taken. I have so much I may not have noticed, ha. Anyway, a little bit later we were pulling out to get on the road & have to stop because there are 2 girls walking down the street in possibly nothing other than towels. They may have had swim suits on, but it wasn't much. This was a funny start for a 11 hour drive ahead of us. THEN 15 minutes later when we were driving through one of the many small towns in northern Indiana there was a man sitting in the middle of the side walk on a computer. It's true how the world never sleeps.

The drive went by with a few stops here & there. My co-pilot had a burst of excitement as she woke up from her nap & burst out with what a certain billboard read. Oh the joys of long road trips!

I had some great help move everything into my apartment & have spent the week learning my way abouts both the apartment & the area. I bought my books for the semester, made a casserole (it is NOT a hot dish), & have enjoyed randomly happening into friends at places like Target & the MOA. I also got to help serve dinner to the new YE teamers. Sorry if this is a bit disjointed, but I'm rather tired. God is good ALL the time.

indebted

I've been done with my Youth Encounter commitment for a week now. It's strange after signing up for an intentional community & all of a sudden being done. When you live & work that closely to others you know how things work. For instance, for the most part for the last 2 years I haven't had to make a decision on when or what I was going to eat for dinner. That's absurd when you really think about it. Now I can eat whatever I want, when ever I want & I actually find myself not having an appetite. Monday morning I woke up & my first thought was "I have to empty out my closet & dresser today." I knew I wanted to do this, but honestly who wakes up after going non-stop for 2 years & thinks that? It was good though, I got it all out, tried lots of things on & parted with many articles of clothing. I think I might still have a yaffa cube of shoes I haven't gone through yet though. It was a challenge using the rule that if I hadn't worn in the last year to get rid of it because I haven't had a good majority of my clothes with me since college. I have learned how little I can truly live off of being on a traveling team, living out of a bag or van, however one views it.

The week went by fast with a bump removal from my jaw, a hair operation (it's heaps shorter now), & a decent amount of resting. I also got to visit with some good friends I don't see all that often. I learned a new fun way to display my earrings too! My dear friend & I were hanging out & I saw this picture frame with netting behind it/attached to it & wondered where she got the idea. She had gotten the idea from another friend & promptly offered to make me one. We went to Michael's picked out a frame which was nicely on sale & then went home & cut the netting to the right size & then stapled it down. I now have a fun new display for my earrings.

After visiting her I went to visit my cousins. I had planned on going to church because I enjoy church & this might be my last weekend for a while choosing where I go to church, plus I really enjoy the community of people at their church. Well we ended up staying up quite late & I didn't think anybody was going to go. However my father woke me up with just the right amount of time to get ready & go. He kinda came & nudged me & said "Hey, are you awake? What are you doing?" I clearly wasn't awake & was sleeping, but he was awake & knew I had said I wanted to go to church.

In the midst of getting ready my cousin woke up & decided to join us, so the 3 of us trekked off to church. Today the church was finishing a series of reading from the book of Ephesians. Both of the theme verses for Youth Encounter over the last 2 years, at least for the ministries I was involved with, were based from Ephesians so I'm pretty familiar with this book. It talks about how the Christian body is meant to work together and live together. A retired pastor spoke, he preaches about once a month there, & it was great to hear how on fire & passionate he was for the message of Jesus Christ. It made me excited to know I'm going to be soon studying more about the Bible & the Christian church. It also got me thinking about how many people around the world are unaware of this message or of who Jesus is. It made me think of all the wonderful people we met this year & how we are called to live for Christ, but their ways of doing so are limited because of many things like government & family situations.

It's easy to come up with an excuse not to go to church, such as not getting enough rest, but why shouldn't we go, especially if we believe & belong to a church? God has done everything for us that we could ever need, even that which hasn't happened yet, God has already done! I can't wrap my mind around that really. I feel indebted to my family around the world that doesn't have the freedoms I do here to go to church, to learn more about the stories I've heard time & time again so that I can do what I believe we are all here to do & live for God knowing His word & His wants.

so what now?

SO I'm done. Yep, my life as it's been for the last 2 years is now done. It's really wierd!

Saturday was Youth Encounter's annual homecoming celebration for the end of the 2008-2009 team year. It was a long, but fun day. I woke up at 6:20am central time only because most everybody else was already up & moving since we needed to be out of the church by around 7. We then had a long fun day of celebrations. It had been raining in the morning, but cleared up for lunch & the afternoon concerts outside & then started raining again after dinner break.

The biggest transition for now is realizing that I don't have to report to anybody & I can choose where I go, when I go, & what I eat. That may seem like life was really strict over the last 2 years, but it wasn't. It was just an intentional community living situation where you check in with everybody else for most everything, or are supposed to. I know it all sounds crazy, but it's been some of the best times of my life. God never fails for fun & adventure. I'll miss all the people & of course I don't like not knowing when I'm going to see many or any of them again, but if nothing else we will all reunite in the kingdom of God some day.

"So what now?"

This was the big question everybody was asking each other on Friday & Saturday & probably all last week while the traveling teams were in debriefing. A good chunk of people are serving a second year with YE, many are starting college, many are going home to rest, & some of us are starting jobs &/or grad school. I belong to the latter part. I'm home at my parents for 2 weeks organizing my life as much as possible before moving to MN for grad school. I'm a bit anxious about all the changes, but glad for a new beginning. It is also a big comfort having so many friends in the Minneapolis/St. Paul area.

We had a fun & God filled summer working at Camp Wapo. We worked mostly with the TIM Teamers (Teens in Mission). TIM Team is a high school leadership ministry program. The campers would come on Friday evening & stay till the following Friday afternoon only to be followed by a new group that evening. We lead low & high rope adventures, workshops, & numerous other silly camp activities.

Today the sorting begins, I'm off to dig into my closet, pull it all out, & sort through what I don't want anymore.

Thank you God for extending your family & for giving me the health to partake in the last 2 years!