Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Life @ 24

"Happy Birthday! Welcome to your mid-twenties!" was my first greeting from my best friend Alissa.

It's hard to believe the path my life has taken and all the ways God has blessed me. I may be 24, but I don't feel any older and all too often still feel like I'm much younger minus the drama that all happened then. Aging is a beautiful thing in my book and it's something I must remember as my life continues and I'm not achieving things that I might've thought would have happened in my life by now had I been asked ten years ago.

I recently was traveling from Montana (where my team currently is) to Indiana for my life long best friend's wedding. I was traveling more or less all day. I had packed a book that I bought at the beginning of the team year and had never found the time to read so I decided this would be a perfect opportunity. The book was "Sex God" by Rob Bell and it's a fast read, but lots to think about and consider.

In the book Bell talks about being worthy of loving yourself before being able to love others or accept their love. I find this to be true. If you do not love yourself then how are we to ever believe that somebody else would love us or being able to give our love to others? He also compares God's love to those in the world who know heart break. When your world changes because of some love and your heart is never the same, the pain, the yearning for understanding, the want to love you more, that's like God's love. It's beyond comprehension, but what I do get from it is like nothing else.

It is because of this love that I continue to seek it out and learn about and see where it leads me.

Recently a friend from college died in a plane crash. The same morning that I was traveling by plane back to Montana after a beautiful wedding. The same morning that my brother was flying to Nevada for a job interview. The same time that hundreds of thousands of others were getting on planes never thinking their lives on earth were about to be over. I pray that all passengers were at peace in the end. This is still a struggle though remembering all the good times with her in college, at her house, in Germany. She was a vibrant young woman who was going to spread love and laughter to everybody she met. She had a hug for everyone and their friends. She was Jesus with skin on for me and several others.

I may be 24 & not where I thought I'd be if you'd asked me at age 14, but I'm trying to gracefully grow and age as God means for me. I have loved and I have felt heart ache and thinking that is anything like God's love seems foolish to some degree, but really a way to know God better & be Jesus with skin on. My friend had bad days just like anybody else, but always had a hug for everybody along the way. If we can all age by showing love like this then we're one step closer to heaven.