Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Moving Rhythm - Hairs, Hearts, & the Unknown

We're now officially past the constant questioning of "How was internship?" This is a good place to be because just like a year or so ago when we were constantly being asked, "How's married life?" we've ran out of answers. Maybe it's not that we've ran out of answers, but more that we've refined our answers and while the processing truly will go with us for the rest of our lives, there comes a time when  you start to move on. You become tired of the answers that you have & want to create new. Just like in a break-up of a relationship, you realize one day that you haven't thought about that person or site all day & you know that while this is a little sad, it is a great accomplishment. Life goes on!

So we're moving on and moving hearts. Throughout my time as a seminary student I have been involved with a church whose slogan is "a church for people who don't like church." Jacob's Well Minneapolis (JW) is an emergent church affiliated with the ELCA - & soon to be a Reconciling in Christ church - that encourages people to go & be the church where life takes you. I was initially attracted by their various forms of worship. The very first time I joined the JW community was early November - I think - 2009 & there was a guest speaker who had written a book about his year living like Jesus. The JW community is one that embodies my passion of lifting up, encouraging, and equipping the priesthood of all believers! Thankfully it is a community that has not only captured my heart for ministry, but also Z's heart. In fact, if you were able to attend our wedding, Pr. D who preached is one of our mentors, pastors, & colleagues from JW. It has been fun to reconnect with the community of JW after being gone for a year. I appreciate the friendships from Group Life & other JW ministries on a much deeper level after being gone. My heart has been moved & I think the Spirit has moved the hearts of others too.

This leads me to the weird place we are in this year. It's a year of "recess" if you will. We all came back ready to reconnect with our peers & some more ready than others to be in the classroom again, but we all know that it's only for another year. There are some who may be here a little longer, or for several more years depending on more education or restriction due to partner's jobs. Already the questions have started of "What's next?" While we have some dreams, we honestly do not know. We've both been working on filling out what the ELCA calls the Rostered Leader Profile (RLP - aka Really Long Paperwork) which, for me, has been great in honing my description of my call to Word & Service Ministry as a Diaconal Minister. While this is helpful, it does not make the anxiety of the unknown any less of a factor in our lives. This is a time where God really is teaching us to trust & simply rest in the peace of the Spirit. So what do I do? While I'm learning to trust & rest in that peace, I still want control. I've done this before & I did it again! I went out on a limb & let a friend drastically change my hair style. I was a bit in shock at first - at the whole experience I think - but I absolutely love it & it didn't take more than hour to come to this point of love.

The experience of my hair...for those who know me well, I used to be VERY particular about my ponytail. I didn't have one for much of my youth due to childhood cancer, so when I could have one, I did. However, in later years I have gotten annoyed with my hair & wanted simplicity with a chic fun vibe. My new friend, L, is a hairstylist who speaks limited English, but has a big heart. His partner is a PhD student at Luther Sem, so as a way to keep his work & to serve the community he styles from his seminary shack (they aren't really shacks, this is just my new catch phrase for the seminary apartments) kitchen. I went over last night with little idea of what I was looking for & while he was cutting away, my friend M & I were planning for a final project we're doing together & she was occasionally translating for us. Not only was I multi-tasking, but I'm so short, that I couldn't see myself in the mirror he had propped up on the table. What a fun surprise!

Internship year is over, Z & I have been married for nearly 16 months, our hearts have been moved by many things, our future is unknown but certain in the resurrection of Christ, & I have a new hairstyle while I'm learning to rest in God's peace that surpasses all understanding.

This is my current moving rhythm. It'll change tomorrow no doubt, but for now...
Post a Comment